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Samantha 1

I think I'm bisexual, NO... I know I'm bisexual.I'm 18 years old, I have a boyfriend though and he is my all. He's my everything the reason for my being, my soulmate, and my heart. Recently though my feelings for women have become 'stronger and stronger. I've always admired the beauty of a woman though, he curves her lips, her hair, women are such beautiful creatures...but at the same time I love men and I love my boyfriend. We have to separate for college and I go to school in Georgia while he is in Virginia. I'm scared that my curiosity (because I have never been with a woman) will get the best of me and I find it so hard to stay strong while we're away. I don't have many people I can talk to. I cant imagine my family being supportive, and many of my friends don't understand the lifestyle. I told my boyfriend that I wanted to remain a couple despite my new acceptance of who I am...I just know it will be hard. In the back of my mind I will ALWAYS be curious of how being with a woman would be...but I feel like I'm sacrificing that because I know I have a supportive loving and caring man in my life who I don't want to bring any hurt to.

And in addition when I feel sexually frustrated the first thing I go to is a picture of a woman, or women to relieve my frustrations. When I finish i often and feel sad, embarrassed, and depressed. I tell my boyfriend everything..he says we'll get through it but he just doesnt understand what I'm going through. I'm bisexual but I am in no way a proud one. I just wish people were accepting, my religious views didnt get in the way of my feelings, and I could learn to accept and love myself...