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'Can a Turk be a gay? 'That's a question asking to the public in my country.That's a question about me. Because I'm a Turk and I'm a gay.

I know that I was gay since I was born. It was only a part of me, hiding and a silent part.
When I was in Qur'an Course in a mosque everyone says: 'Homosexual demons are invading the world.This is the doomsday!'

And so I hate homosexuality.It was all a demon in your soul and must be punished at once.Everyday I went the mosque and prayed God to become a normal and rescue myself from this devil.
What happened then? I continue living with the devil.I can only forget the devil when I was reading a book. So I become a wormbook. But the books doesn't only help me to forget the devil. It also expands my vision. My perspective to the life. I see homosexuality exists before I was born. It really shocked me(Guess how we not acknowledged are). It's just always hiding in a place of our lives.I wanna show people this,the truth.They of course don't wanna understand me. When I say I was a gay to my parents, I was immediately send a psychologist to become a normal. And of course this doesn't change anything too. And will not.

Things not good here.Some people even don't know what a 'gay' means. When you say you're a gay they only laugh at you or ignore you.My mum's still silently crying why she's punished like this. Because people are obsessed with sex. If you don't have a boy or girlfriend you cant exist in world. That's the perceptivity and that's the matter. I'm not.

And it's the matter of being a human. I also told my best friend and she only thanked me for sharing this.

I'm 16 now and I don't give up my struggle and will not. I see many people in the streets. They're desperate, breathing but not living, they're here but not with themselves. If you really wanna change your life only YOU can do it. I learn this from life. Be always happy because you worth it. And sorry for disgusting English:)