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Toby: Coming out at 14

Hi, I’m Toby, I’m 14 and I came out about number 2 months ago. I think I've known I was gay since I was 11 or 12. I told myself that I needed to tell someone but I didn't have the balls to tell them myself, so I just text my friend Emily told her I was gay. It’s a lot easier coming out through text because all u have to do is click and send, but I strongly advise against it because I had butterflies in my stomach all weekend until I saw her again on Monday. At first she didn't believe me because I was quite masculine (on the outside) and I was a bit of a joker, so she thought I was joking. Anyway I saw her in school and she gave me a big hug which felt great and reassuring. The following weekend I told another 2 girls who were part of the group (in person). Then I didn't tell anyone else for another 4 months. I then told a few of the lads in my rugby team. They were surprisingly ok with it except a few knob heads who I didn't like anyway. Shortly after that everyone knew which I was expecting, so I was ok with that. I don't get bullied because I’m not the type of person you'd mess with. But it did come as a shock to everyone, even though I was never the slightest bit homophobic, I was the last person you’d expect to be gay. Next I told my 2 big sisters, who were fine and then I told my mum which was really hard, she was confused and had a time to begin with, we didn't talk until the next day and my sisters where disgusted with her because we were such a close family, but after she had thought about it she came to terms and we had a heart to heart and now we’re closer than ever. Now my life is great I have a better social life, I’m looked up to and most importantly I can be myself. If I was you ide come out gradually when you’re ready because it’s great. Don't be scared.

AVERT Says: Coming out is not easy. But like the author or this story, you can feel a great sense of liberation upon doing so. If you would like further information about Coming Out, check out our page.