Stories of Sex Education

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If you would like to add your personal stories of Sex Education, then please email us with what you would like to say.

GemmaAnnetteDanielLouise
WillJacobHeatherTeach respect
MaryAnneBeaCathyPeter
TatianaBarbaraRebekahMichael

Gemma

I'm an 18-year-old atheist from England.

I think what people who believe that ignoring social problems will make them go away forget is that you don't have to understand sex to want it - or to have it. I agree that sex ed at school often sends out
confusing messages, but that's only because teachers are so frightened of irate parents trying to blame them for their child's mistakes. If a young person winds up pregnant or with an STD, then trying to use
public education as a scapegoat to escape their guilt does nothing to help the child.

Plenty of parents complain that they feel disconnected from their teenagers, that they "won't talk to them". Surely it's better young people learn from a responsible adult than some trial-and-error approach. I am jealous of those people who can talk to their parents about sex, and any other problems - that's good parenting. But for people like me, whose parents refused to talk to them, sex ed at school may be the only shot they get.

I learnt what sex was when I was 7 years old - by looking up nearly every related word in a dictionary. I think that's a sad way to learn about it; you can hardly consider that a well-rounded education. My parents are the sorts who refused to talk to me about the changes my body was going through because I was "too young to know about that yet". Which was clearly ridiculous. I was 12 when I got my first bra fitted, and I turned out to be a B-cup already. When my first period started, I was too afraid to tell my mum because for some reason I thought she would be cross with me. I coped for two before I ran out of supplies my school had given me and had to tell her - she showed me where the sanitary towels were and that was that. My body was changing too fast for their narrow minds to accept, so I simply had to cope by myself.

As for my sex ed from school, it was far from bad, despite being totally mechanical. It was very focussed on the actual physical act and nothing else. If you want to stop kids from having sex, I think a
holistic approach is needed, encompassing the emotional side of things. Not just the "this bit goes here". I know plenty of people who lost their virginity young (I mean, between 12 and 14 sort of age) and they
regretted not their age, neither the experience itself, nor the place, or anything - just the person they did it with.

Individual maturity should be valued more than age. I'm 18 - old enough to have sex legally - and I haven't, because I’m not in love with anyone. If I’d felt ready at 16, I would have done it. So long as you wake up the next morning and roll over to look at your partner and smile, then I reckon that's a
pretty good sign you made the right decision. A piece of paper and a band on gold guarantee very little as regards safe sex.

That's something I’ll remember about my sex ed teacher at school - she said, "Anyone can have sex, that bit is easy. Rabbits don't even notice it happening. Doing it right is what is difficult." Those three
sentences made me think more about sex than my mother, who calmly informed me that virgin marriages are the best kind. This coming from the woman who wouldn't talk to me for two days after I found the pill lying around on the side board - as though it was my fault she was sexually active.

I think sex is part of a healthy life, and a healthy fulfilling relationship with someone worthwhile. Sex education should, without any doubt in the world, be taught in schools. If we don't, we're headed
toward the dilemma Africa is facing with AIDs - ignoring Roman Catholic abstinence nonsense, and having unprotected sex.

It should be normal to discuss sex. And parents are free to have their input at home, as much as they choose. But, for crying out loud - ignoring problems do not make them go away, and people who are too weak to discuss such important lessons with their children, who are too immature to accept their children are growing up - people who run away from reality, these are the sort of people who shouldn't be having children anyway. Teach young people to responsible for themselves, and parents won't have to wrap them up in cotton wool in the first place.

To borrow a phrase from Francis Bacon: Knowledge is power.

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Annette

Hi, My name's Annette I'm 21 and I live in Australia.

I had already pieced together most of the "sex talk" before I was eight. When I was six, me and my friend used to put socks down out undies and hump each other before we even knew what we were doing. my first educational experience was at a drive-in one evening with the family when I decided to go wonder off and see what was screening on the opposite side to our screen. This was a revolutionary moment for me. The movie was Lightning Jack - A comedy about two outlaws who just wanted to be wanted. There was some scene involving a mute black man, a sexually confident saloon girl and a saddle. I haven't watched the film since so my memory is most likely a bit blurry. But that pretty much gave me the information I needed to start piecing things together. I came to the conclusion that babies were made from a man's sweat when he has an intense need to hold a woman.

I've been pretty sexually aware ever since. So before knowing anything about erect penises and seamen and intercourse, I learned the key element behind it all. The want for another body/lust. My first sex-ed class was when I was 9, and it was purely puberty based, and well done. I think it's important for children to be taught sex-ed at school because not all parents are up for the job, and not all children are willing to be that open about their sexuality to their parents. We has sex-ed classes every year from what I can remember.  We had a box where we could leave anonymous questions for them to be answered the the next class. I remember asking the teacher if we could get pregnant while on our period. That seemed to baffle her a bit coming from a 10 year old.

I didn't actually go through any sexual development until I was 12, and by then I'd been told all about different sanitary items, with and without wings! light vs. heavy etc etc. Out classes by the age of 12 were pretty much confirming knowledge about sexual development, and informing us about sexual intercourse in more detail. Previous years were pretty much "this goes in here, seamen comes out, travels along here meets the egg and BABY". In High school the pubescent education was over. It was from then on more like a sexually orientated biology lesson. Learning what develops at each stage of pregnancy. Shown different contraception methods, shown how to put condoms on, learned all the statistics, all about when people ovulate, hormone levels for both sexes. All in all a pretty good education.

Just recently I watched a television presentation called "Texas teenage virgins" and it scared the crap out of me! Here I am coming from a really well informed perspective and hearing how some of the kids weren't taught anything about sexual intercourse because abstinence is the best option. It's impossible to argue with that, but every body has hormones therefore everybody is susceptible to having sex so everyone should be educated on what they can arm them with to prevent things like STDs and pregnancy when abstinence fails. I'm now really keen to become a sex-Ed teacher. I believe there's a few gaps in our sexual education I could fix as well.

From my experience we're more likely to have sex when it's late at night or you're alone with someone of your sexual preference or you've been drinking or You've been watching a raunchy movie together or it's dark. Things easily avoided if you don't want to have sex. My life would have a been a bit less eventful if I didn't do a lot of those things.

But thanks to my education, I've never done anything as a teen I've regretted.

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Daniel

I am 22 years old and I've had 2 sex-ed classes.

The first was in Bettendorf, Iowa and I was in 6th grade.  I had moved there during my 5th grade year.  The class I had was a comprehensive sex-ed class.  I took it during the 2nd semester of that year.  There are many things to say about this especially since I have a near-photographic memory.

Looking back, this class was a disservice for me.  Long story short, it was too intense and I was not ready for such detailed information.  At the end of the course I believe that I was addicted to sex and sexual thought.

The biggest reason why this class had such a negative impact on me could be pinned on one thing: posters.  Specifically, posters of male and female genitalia.  They were displayed on the wall of the classroom and I remember very clearly that I stared at the female one every day (I'm a guy if you haven't figured it out yet).  This was the equivalent of looking at pornography everyday.  Since guys are very easily visually stimulated in the 6th grade it's no wonder I turned out the way I did.

In my seventh grade year I moved to Sergeant Bluff, Iowa.  I had a sex-ed course in the last part of my 8th grade year.  This course was an abstinence-only class.  Taking sex-ed the second time around was very different.  I actually learned some things!  It was a quarter long and they concentrated on the different stages of life rather than an intense focus on puberty like the first class did.

In both situations my parents did not talk to me beforehand at all.  When they signed the permission slip for my 6th grade year all they told me was, "You're going to be learning about how babies are made" and that was it.

Back then I was not comfortable with myself as a sexual being (it's ironic that most parents fear that of their child).  In my house sex was a taboo.  You just didn't talk about it.  As a result I had no one to talk to when it came to my sexual or otherwise personal feelings.

To this day I despise them for not talking to me, even though I already knew about it.  In high school my dad wanted me to see a therapist because of all the moving we've done (I've moved 7 times at this point) and also because of the fact that we weren't very close as a family.  Many subjects were talked about but there was one that I kept coming back to and it was sexualality.

To come to the current day, I have thought a lot about this subject and have come to a conclusion.  First, be open with your children about "personal" body parts when they're in grade school.  Don't make sex or other related topics a taboo.  Second, tell them about puberty before it happens (in other words before 5th or 6th grade).  You don't have to talk about sex then but at least tell them what's going to happen (especially for girls).  Third, the sex talk should take place between 5th grade and 8th grade.  The easiest time would be when you tell them about puberty or sometime soon after that.  From there keep the discussion open and encourage then to talk about it with yourself.

As for sex-ed classes, don't take a comprehensive course.  Just don't.  Abstinence is okay but comprehensive especially at 6th grade is way too much for children.

Best wished,

Daniel

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Louise

My name is Louise and i currently taking work placement as a social work student at a primary school. after reading all these entires i have strongly agreed with some people.

At this moment in time, this school is trying to educate their students about 'themselves'... but becuase of the policies of the Catholic Education Office, certain topics are not allowed to be spoken about in class. This is ridiculous... the grade 5/6's are embarking on the transition into high school and they are going into a new world without knowing the basics of 'sex'.

i feel sorry for these children as they will be totally shocked once they finally learn about 'sex'. I feel that the school and the Catholic system is trying to hide the children away from the truths of our society, that they are trying to protect these children from the horrors of the real world.

Sex education in schools is a must! i can only imagine what these kids are going to grow up learning and what they learn... how on earth it will affect them...

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Will

My name is Will. I will soon be 12 years old.

Well its funny that I should find this site. I have noticed that many places wait too long to tell people about sex. In my school they begin talking about puberty in grade 4. They repeat what was told in grade 4 in grade 5 but they also brush the basics about sex. Though I knew everything I learned in grade 5 before that due to freinds.

In grade 6 it blew me away how much they told. Though the video they showed us was high school leveled in terms of vocabulary so it was ahrd to understand. I was told everything i already knew but much more. The only thing it did not cover was exactly HOW to have sex. I do belive this is right though i have know it since i was in grade 5.

As for my parents they avoid the subject of sex completely. Even the subject of puberty. I don't feel comfortable asking them about anything sex related.

Well thats it,

Will

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Jacob

To whom it may concern... i just have a "few" thoughts about your website i'd like to rant and rave if you don't mind... i'll try to control my language but you can edit it all or nothing if it so pleases you. Aweomse site by the way it's very interesting (i find anyway) to read school teachers views and thoughts.

Just coming out of highschool and such i had one REALLY good teacher that taught me sex-ed even though she wasn't supposed to in the middle of english class soem kids were joking around about somehting i can't remeber and she said "ok you know what? let's all have a talk because this morning i had a grade 8 girl ask me the best way to give head to a boy". Now i know what your thinking that shocked the f**king s**t outa me and then i realized that really... that's only a few years 4 years between grade 8 and 12. Some people date people 10 12 years there senior or younger and my parents are 5 years apart so maybe i'm just used to it and 4 years is a big differance but whatever. So anyway my entire class of about 30-35 kids (actuall class size more like 50 with a teacher's aid but see my previous rant on what not to do when there's someone dressing down or punching kids in the hall) shut up. that's an amzing feat mind you. then she told us to ask her any questions concerning sex at all ever and she would answer.

Right away a few of the guy's asked some stupid questions like i heard you can make a condom out of tin foil? they high fived each other and so on but one of the girls asked does plastic wrap work? everyone laughed at that but hey in a pinch does it work or not? my teacher answered no and blah blah but then she let us ask her questions and joke about whatever and didn't bother us about termonology and what we should be calling a man's penis and what we shouldn't be calling it. Whenever one of us said something that wasn't ture or just a bit off she would step in and say nope it dosn't work like that and this is what you do... Compareing that to my actuall sex-ed classes in junior high when i attended a certain catholic school. My teacher did almost the same thing with the questions, she got us all to write them down (with no names of course) and stick them in a box then she would read them out loud, A great and awesome way i think to start. When it came time to open the box and read some though it went down hill from there... there were some questions that made her blush and some that made her so pissed off that she left in a mad rush out of the class room. Now of course everyone wants to see why the teacher got so mad so we all go up and look and the question was "why are there flavoured condoms". a simple question witha simple answer such as because some times people like to orally plaesure there partner or something would have sufficed. The girl that wrote the question down got in big shit from her parents and the school (she was the only that used a pink pen go figure eh?) so i think in reality adults need to grow up.

if you look at statistics about pornoghraphy almost 50% of the looking at pron as it is sometimes called is done by CHILDREN yes people kids are not the holy virginal creatures you take us for sometimes in fact i walked in on a cetain member of my family doing a solo act to the t.v. and he was many years short of being 18. In fact i will now link you a website with statistics, i don't know about there credibility but i do know as an 18 year old that kids OFTEN get into adult things becuase of there parents or some clumsy adult leaving things laying around that shouldn't be laying around. I once was forced by my dad to clean up (a dog or something ripped it up.. more likely an angry parent/spouse) a playboy magazine the thickness of a telephone book in a nearby playground! Needless to say i learned alot that day at the ripe age of 9 about the joy of reading. While cleaning this up my friends (roughly 12 kids my age) came to help me and a few of them as young as 6 i believe. I clearly remeber a girl my age picking up the most entact pages and stuffing them into her pockets. When asked by all the other kids what she was doing she shrugged and left (after grabbing several more). So maybe this is my own messed up Childhood but i think that this is somewhat the norm i have been over to kids houses where the kids of the house promptly showed me there dad's collection of "reading material". Some of you may blame the internet for such lewd acts for showing so many children porn so easily. If that child is so innocent how do you think he/she found those internet sites? Most sites that kids go to are gaming sites and such and as a frequenter on amany of those websites i can guarantee you that no adult popups shall force demonic wrath upon your child.

Rewinding to sex-ed again... is it any wonder kids have so many unanswered questions about what is right and what is wrong? And asking your parents about sex... hmm yea that's an awesome way to get yourself grounded from playing with a good friend who's parents are shady so says your parents who've never met them. Or an equally awesome way to get grounded off the televsion or computer for vast amounts of time. Trust me i know after i found that magazine i started asking all kinds of questions just casualy wanting to know about life right? i got yelled at and told to go to my room for something i didn't even know about. and again i know friends that have parents like mine. and no my parents are'nt evil or hardcore old fashioned... my mother is in fact gay and proud to be and my father is just an average dood living his life. What i'm trying to say is threw this big massive rant is that people need to get into the nitty gritty detail about sex with SOME kids and the other kids i believe should be gently eased into it and for those of you that say they shouldn't be taught at all?. i have learned through my friends more experianced with me as about what to do and how somehting works and such and we all know how accurate friends are on some things as much as they try to be. So i say an adult should tell them what is and what isn't about sex. Stop avoiding it in schools because it's all around us in the music kids like to listen too (good example Ludacris "what's your fantasy", Eminem Feat. nate dawg "shake that" and Techno "Ulitimate sex track") and books we read... i read a crapload of novels and such everything from Anne Rice to R.A. Salvatore (and his books are way better that tolkeins ever will be) and these boks have smatterings of sexual content also. So anyway thank you for reading my long winded rant about my life's encounters of the sexy kind hahaha. Thanks =D

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Heather

Hello, my name is Heather, I have had twenty non-stop years of public school.  Growing up in small-town Idaho, I was not exposed to very many "worldly" events.  However, the public school system did include sex-ed classes starting in fifth grade and continuing on until freshman/sophomore year of high school.  Looking back I guess the information that we learned was appropriate for our age level, moving from basic physical changes to safe-sex and pregnancy prevention.  Really, most of my information came from my mom in regards to physical changes, more on sexuality was disclosed as I matured.

My mother impressed a strong absentenance view while growing up, my father still thinks I'm a 24-year-old virgin.  My first sexual experience was when I was sixteen, I used protection and was dating in a monogamous relationship.  From that point, I realized that birth-control and female  health needed to be address.  I was consent getting UTI's and not knowing what/where they were from.  The health professionals were very discrete about the cause and didn't come out and ask me about my sexual status because my mother was present.

As an adult and a social worker I see sex education as paramount in the public school system.  Of course abstaining from sexual contact is the only sure way to be 100% clear of STI's, pregnancy, and emotional distress.  But looking at the facts, this is rarely the case for young people.  Viewing their experiences as "immoral and damaging" sends a very profound message: "you should not experience your sexuality until society finds you ready".  Really, individuals will ultimately choose when they are ready if given the facts and resources to access measures that increase safety.  I believe that birth control should be free of charge and openly available to anyone who  wants it.  This includes young men to access it for their partners if she is unable to.  I also think condoms and access to healthcare professionals needs to be expected and nurtured.  Changing the climate around these issues will also change the frequency of abortions and unwanted pregnancies.  STI's would also decline and I believe a sense of control and dignity would be resorted to young people especially young women.

We have the right!

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Teach respect

My name is George I am a student at a private christian school I myself don't belive in sexual education at school for girls especialy. they are way too emotional some worthless punk boy who has no respect for women comes along and sweet talks a girl into having sex. then the poor girl is terrified that the boy will tell his pals and she will be classified as a (lady of the evening) if you get my point.

I think we should teach yong teen boys how to have outstanding respect for women how to talk to them open the door hold there chiars while they sit down by doing this our next gneration of men would be very worthy. I respect chastity in women hood and would nnnnnnnnever have sex with one until I put a wedding ring on her finger and swore to love her and cherish her forever

george

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MaryAnne

Funny that I should find this site. After reading some of what others have written I thought I would put my two cents in as today during a class was a prime example of how ignorance can really be a parent's downfall.

I work in a class which teaches high school students to think at a higher level, among other things. I've been in this program for two years now and really love my kids. My daughter is actually one of my students as well, and even her friends have asked me all sorts of questions. I answer honestly but always with an air of caution to be sure I don't offend anyone - including their parents. Today was one of those days.

The 10th grade class is much smaller than the freshman class (for AVID, where I tutor) and they are encouraged, nay required, to bring a question to class everyday pertaining to their other classes. This year there is a new tutor who I have tried to help learn the program. I took over working with this class today as she and the teacher were busy doing other things. One student finally asked this question from reseach she had done for Health class: "Aside from getting STD's and pregnant, why do adults think having sex is bad?" Long story, short, she was actually asking why do adults think kids shouldn't have sex. I could see in the other tutor's eyes she was not truly comfortable with the nature of the question but I wasn't going to let it deter me in answering. The student had said that in her research sex was supposed to be healthy, something about even making your teeth stronger and helping with depression (yeah, I laughed). I explained that while sex can be healthy and you can even burn calories, it certainly isn't a replacement for regular excercise and that it can promote endorphins which can curb depressed attitude but that's not its goal either. On the health side I also asked about prostitutes. They aren't always the healthiest group and they certainly aren't the happier group because of their profession so her original research probably wasn't all that accurate. Another student added it was about your morals, and I quickly agreed but then asked the students to take that away for the moment, along with the religious aspect and focus on the other issue - the one no one had mentioned - the emotional health and well-being of a person. All the other stuff aside, this was the most important because that's really what sex is about when it comes down to it. And at their age, they really aren't equipt to handle all that comes along with the actions.

Though this was about a 10 minute discussion, I was about to wind down the other tutor piped up in a rather cold tone stating that this had really gone on long enough and that she knew parents of two of the students and personally wouldn't want her daughter listening to any of this. I said nothing for the moment until she looked at me and said she could see on the students' faces that they were uncomfortable (they were mostly facing me and she was in the back of the class) and because of that the discussion needed to end. She felt that no one needed to talk to them except their parents because her child talks to her. And though this may be from Health class, this wasn't the place to talk about it. What I found even more interesting was the student who asked the question originally asked the other tutor why what I was saying was wrong? The tutor's answer, you should be talking to your parent.

Why would anyone in their right mind think that's the cure-all? Maybe if parents were more comfortable and children felt like they could have these types of conversations then there wouldn't be a need for health class. Because I'm in a public school I can't discuss religion but heaven knows there are a lot of religious people out there, unmarried, having sex and getting pregnant - and guess what? A lot are teenagers. And why is it okay to discuss this in Health class but no where else? It just didn't make any sense!!! I wasn't being obsene, graphic or even promoting sex in any way. The other tutor felt I should have kept the answer short and go on to the next. But I don't care how you look at it, that one student who asked the question would have known it as a brush-off had I done that.

You have to be upfront and honest without losing site of the responsibility of what you're saying. I think that's the key. If someone, like this other tutor, thinks I have crossed a line in someway, then it shows the amount of ignorance one can have. Its not just up to the parents - it takes a village to raise a child.

MaryAnne

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Bea

Hello I am 13 years old and I go to a all girls private school you would expect the sex-ed to be pretty good but its not!

We only learn about puberty in yr 7 and for some girls that’s too late(mi best friend started at 10 and didn’t know wot was happening to her!)

We don’t learn about Oral or any other sexual related things that we NEED to know.

I don’t want to have sex personally but wouldn’t even know what it was properly if friends hadn’t told me all the biology  diagrams show is that something goes into something else and some people don’t know what a boys parts look like.

I think that at 13/14 Year 9(UK)are mature enough to learn about everything to do with sex and a member of the other sex’s body as if you and your b/f choose to have a sexual relationship of any kind then they should have the FULL facts before you get the wrong information from your friends and do dangerous things that could damage or hurt you.

Love Bea (hope other people my age agree with me)

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Cathy

I'm a California public school teacher. As part of my job I have the responsibility to teach a "puberty class" for 5th graders, and a much more comprehensive "6th Grade Sex Education Course." I'm a "known quantity" at my school. I'm the only teacher who has the entire intermediate student population (just over 300 kids) in my classroom, day after day, every year. I teach Science to 4th, 5th, and 6th graders, so students are in my class for three years in a row. By that third year, students have learned that I will answer their questions (about anything...) with absolute honesty. Likewise they tend to volunteer information to me that they would never tell their parents. I always start by reminding them that I am a designated reporter, and if what they are about to tell me indicates that they are in a situation that could harm them, I will be calling CPS (Child Protective Services.) They still talk to me. I have called, and will continue to call CPS on occasions that warrant reporting. I'm still an adult students can talk to about "things they have tried." When I tell them "Don't do that again... it's really dangerous and here's why..." they actually listen, because they know I care too much not to tell them the hard truths.

I've been reading the letters sent in, and I am extremely proud of the teens who've written. They understand (probably better than most adults) that going up against biological drives "uninformed" is just not smart. True, prior knowledge isn't a cure-all when it comes to sex, but it's certainly better than learning by "trial and error." Kids need the truth, and yes, they can handle the truth! While maturity levels vary, in general, 6th grade is not too young to learn about human sexuality.

Cathy

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Peter

Hi, my name's Peter and I'm 56 years old.

I've read a lot of stories sent to you on the subject of sex-ed.  As a teenager growing up in the "swinging sixties", I suppose the subject was discussed in our schools but I have to be honest, whatever education we did get seemed to go out the window as soon as you left the classroom.  Everybody was too busy deciding what to wear down the local youth club that night etc.  As for where our education came from I suppose it was from messing about behind bike-sheds or if you were lucky and lived near the beach the sand dunes could no doubt tell a few stories.

Getting back on a more serious note, I do feel its very important for the youth of today to get a proper sex-ed other than doing as we did in the sixties, not only from the diseases one can get but for the mental benefits a good education can provide. I hope I've been able to help,thank you for taking time to read the memories of an "aging hippy", still smiling after all these years.

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Tatiana

Hi. My name is Tatiana and im 16 years old. I haven't had much of Sex Education but the little I've had didnt help much. The first time i even heard of sex ed was my 7th grade year. Everything my teacher told the class, we all pushed aside because we were SURE that she was doing all she told us not to. How are we going to listen to a bad influence?

I recieved sex ed classes again my freshman year of high school but it wasnt exactly a class. They were basicly just telling us how its supose 2 be done. I looked around my class and instead of the other students being concerned, they were ready to go home so they can try what they just learned!

The next few days they informed us on the dangers of sex and what STDS and diseases you can recieve and how you would get them, but half of my class already tried what they've heard. Yale students were the ones teaching us (were supose 2 teach us) what's right from wrong. They didn't do anything but confuse us or push us.

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Barbara

My name is Barbara. I am 30 years old. I have a 9 year old daughter. We were taught sex ed in school. Plus mom did the scare talk. (Mom had me at 14, First sexual encounter,) I worry more of what my child has learned from other kids. some of it is funny. A few months ago my daughter informed me that sex was when you took your clothes off and pinned them to the wall. I have explained to her (with drawings as well) how her body is about to change. What will happen on the outside and inside and why. I wanted to assure her that we all change. I didn't have a book so (i took a human sexuality class in college) I drew the pictures of the female body, outside and inside. Named the different parts (properly) and explained how they change and why. (for bearing children, but didn't explain how that happens.)

I have started to talk to her about boys as she notices them. But the information must be kept at her maturity level. My great concern is not knowing what they will teach in 5th grade if anything. (I went to the same school as my child and the class wasn't until 6th grade and that was on puberty it was too late for some) I want and am willing to do the education.

I'd perfer abstinance, but reality is I won't be there to say no for her. I need to at least help her protect herself. But right now I know for a fact that she is not ready for more information then I have given her. I continue to keep the lines of communication open. At the same time I tell her what we discuss is between us.

She is just discovering boys are more then fishing buddy's and fellow race car fans. So she is use to discussing most things with her younger male cousins or boyfriends. I knew all the schools had to teach and what my mother had to teach. What I am trying to give my child is a person she can speak to, a person she can go to with questions. I have recruited a couple of my close friends to be someone to listen if need be (and not tell me all details) and help me make sure she is protected.

Right now I am the mommy, a person that is still admired and looked up to. But when she hits the teen years? I need to build the relationship now, keep the lines open now. I need to teach her about her body, her mind and making and taking responsiblity for her own choices. I could never feel confident leaving something this important up to someone else. It is also a closeness, to tell my daughter how our bodies change as we become women and and answer her questions. And then ask her if there is anything else she would like to know. And then see the look on her dad's face when he see's the drawings and realizes his little girl is growing up.

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Rebekah

Hello,

My name is Rebekah and I am a 20 year old student a Johnson Bible College in Knoxville, TN. Yes, I am a Christian and I believe that abstinence is the best way to avoid the complications of sex. I am also still a virgin and very proud of that fact. I had a sex ed class in high school and I learned so much about sex from that class that I did not know. It was a great class. I come from a small town in Indiana where we have quite a few pregnancies at the school. I have friends that have had sex and are still sexually active. I do not think less of them for it. They are wonderful people. Here, at a Bible college, I am surprised to find that many students do not agree with a sex ed class because of fear that the schools will teach immoral standards. I don't believe that. I think if you have an opportunity to give people accurate information about how to protect themselves, then you should. I was just doing research on this project and found this website and the responses of people and I felt like giving my opinion on the subject. I think sex ed classes are a great idea and should be in curriculums. If parents don't like it, then they have the option of pulling out their child. Today's society is sexually active. Sex is everywhere. We cannot just ignore that fact anymore. We have to educate teenagers about what to do to avoid some problems later in life. Let's face it, most teens are not going to be abstinent. We need to at least give them wisdom in some way. That is the whole point of education, isn't it?

Thank you and I would appreciate comments.

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Michael

hello,

I am a guy, 26 years old, from California, and I am in college part time and provide services for computer programming part time. My experience with sex ed classes is the following. 1. I only had one such class in junior high school. It was a little early for me, I was like 15 years old, and it was not really good useful knowledge. But, even so, I guess they did a pretty good job with the class. It was very detailed and had lots of questions, but not much one-on-one discussion, or small group discussion. It was kind of all over you know, lots of information. It needs to be way more serious. They need to like yell it at you like in the military, that this could save yor life.... I mean this is IMPORTANT, You could get AIDS and DIE! for goodness sake. I think it should be required to take such a class every year. It needs to be more realistic, and not have that much information but more about what we do need to know. Mostly condoms. that is the most important thing. absolutely. there are sexually transmitted diseases that people can possibly get, and these days we have technology, called "condoms" which when used properly can basically protect you almost 100 percent. Then there is pregnancy. you dont want to get pregnant if you are not ready right?? It will change your life. That is for sure, so you want to be ready and prepared when you do do that .....to have kids. So, you use a condom every time and you will be covered and you will be safe.... I am now 26 years old, and I must say I hope that the girl that I get interested in will be most educated and intelligent to know the right stuff. There are a lot of benefits to having sex. It is generally a very healthy thing to do, actually, and part of your bodies' normal functions, like exercise. As a matter of fact it is a form of exercise. There are several ways to have sex. Self-sex, which is called masturbation, has a bad connotaion, and some people look on this very negatively. But really that is just practice of the real thing, right? Its like a test screening, or a demo, or a test run. Its basic training. Its like preparation. They say practice makes perfect... There is your standard relationship which should be positive and safe at all times. When a girl and guy get into bed to get some action they should be prepared and have the basic safety equipment. Now what would that be.. let me see... hmmm.. oh yeah, the "condom"! Not a big deal. Also I wanted to say that there are very important ways that girls should protect themselves. This is called the female condom. And frankly I am shocked that there is not much infomation out there about the female condom. You can buy them at any so-called "Drug Store" like Save-On. But don't buy any drugs there by the way, you dont need to take drugs thats disgusting. These idiots call their store a drug store, man. You can also buy it on the internet, Ask your doctor and he/she will tell you more about that. This is a way that girls can protect themselves proactively. It is a condom but for ladies. It goes on the inside of the female private parts. Its like a suction cup kind of thing. You get the idea. Now go buy one. they cost about 15 dollars on the internet or at the so-called "drug store" . Dont tell me its too expensive, thats bullshit. Get the money and buy it. Dont make me go out there and educate the whole world. The idea with education is that everyone can have a win-win situation. We all can have a great life and achieve our dreams and have a nice reliable and respectable life, there do not have to be any sad endings. Thank you, and best of luck to you, please make the safest decision for yourself at all times, michael

college student, Los Angeles, CA

AVERT.org: Female condoms are available at family planning clinics, drugstores and some supermarkets in the US for much less than 15 dollars. The cost in clinics or when authorized by a private doctor is covered by Medicaid in some states. Find out more about the female condom.

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Last updated April 21, 2008