Bernhard

I am a member of the Positive Speakers in my local support group for people living with HIV/Aids in Namibia.

When I tested HIV positive for the first time I did not believe my result. I had been tested at a private doctor and didn’t get any counselling. I went three times for testing at the local clinics in Walvis Bay. The results were the same.

I thought it would never happen to me because I am Boxer, powerful and strong in my body. It was very emotional and painful for me. I kept it secret but that also caused me pain. I thought that I was going to die and my family and friends were going to discriminate against me; gossip about me.

Then I found a new family through the People Living with HIV/AIDS Support group at the Walvis Bay Multi-Purpose Centre Trust. I can tell you that it is important to join a support group to share your feelings with others. It helped me a lot. After I got support and information from the support group, I decided to disclose my HIV status to my Family.

And on 15 May 2003 I decided to disclose my HIV status to the public. I shocked the world when I announced at a Swakopmund candle light vigil that, I, Bernhard Kamatoto from Namibia, a Southern Africa champion boxer, am HIV positive. When I announced my status, I said to myself that to die is unacceptable and to have people discriminate against me is unacceptable.

This past six years I still live with my people, but I moved from my house to take responsibility for myself. I now rent my own room. I am a father of a 5 year old boy who is also HIV positive and he lives with me. I want him to grow up to live positively with the virus and to protect himself. Having my son gives me the strength to continue to be a spokesman for people living with HIV. I made it my mission to learn to take care of my child and myself.

There have been times when I have been very sick but usually, with healthy living and my medications, I am well and strong. I am one of the lucky ones as I have responded optimally to the medication with no side effects. I know that many people living with HIV/AIDS in Namibia don’t take their treatment correctly because of a lack of information. I have been given a second chance for life with my treatment and everyday I think that my lucky stars are shining.

By becoming a Positive Speaker, the door has opened for me to talk to thousands of people all around Namibia. I remind people that getting HIV is not the end of the road and that there should be no stigma attached to it. I have become a Namibian ambassador and it makes me proud that people recognize me as a brave and valuable person. Many people who have questions about HIV have come up to me or called me, especially men. When I wear my red t-shirt that says Living with HIV, I get a lot of support. Because people know my status I have been able to help those who are scared and alone.

I don't want people to say to my family your child was useless.

Bernhard Kamatoto

Namibia

(back to top)

A mother, Ethiopia

Dear all, how are you? I want my name annonym and my story out in the open. I am an Ethiopian. I found out that I was HIV+ in April, 07 when I was pregnant. I insisited on getting the test against my Doc's oppostition as he felt that I was a very healthy person. But then I was thinking for my baby.

When I found out, I was shocked but since I had previously all the psychological readiness when I decided to have the test, I managed it very well. I then demanded to have my CD4 count done in May. It was 251 and the Doc said I didn't need to start any treatment. I then decided to deliver with CS (Cessarian Section) and never breastfed. I was given one tablet hours before my CS and a day aftr he was born my baby was given a drop of Neviraprine. Now, I felt that my baby is ok. Atleast the Doc told me that he is 98% safe. Now he is 4 months, healthy and is growing up so fast.

In October I had my CD4 chount and Viral load done. My CD4 is now 659 without a treatment just because I took care of myself after delivery. My viral load is 5952  copy/ml. The Doctor said I am far from starting ARV and that I should just take care.

With my partner (the father of my son), it was very difficult. At first I thought we can never be the same again. But he told me he needed sometime to process the information and he is afraid to take his test. I've been reading alot about the disease and tried to convince my partner. But he said he'd do it at his own time. But he still loves me, we use condoms and are leading normal life.

I told my status to my family except my parents. My sister felt that they might be destroyed with that information and no need to tell them. But  she treats me as if nothing happened. My brother is most educated and understanding. He also monitors my situation and takes care of me. So, I'm now a very happy working mum. I want all you women to be the same. We all have equal probability of death, which is inevitable anyways. Live today and let tomorrow handle itself.

Love you all!!

AVERT.org has more about preventing mother-to-child HIV transmission.

(back to top)

Paul

Just came across your organisation in the net. I wish to thank you for the effort you have done so far to encourage the infected and the affected. I am from Cameroon and a student and was lately affected by this infection.

My uncle is the centre of the story. The whole quest deals on faithfulness in marriage. He was a young man of about 40 with a wife and four children. He was the hope for many of us in the family. He was a well trained laboratory technicien. He did his courses in Cameroon, worked here for sometime and left for Italy where he studied.

He has been operating his small clinic in one village around, when he suddenly fell sick. No one knew what was happening to him. This just happened at a time when AIDS history in my area was still a mystery. He just died some time after and is then that I knew he had extra marital activities. Right now no body can tell the children their father died of the sickness because I feel that is going to create a negative impact on them.

(back to top)

Kola

My name is Kola, I had been very ill for several months, and I had been in and out of the hospital weeks before I finally took the HIV test based on my Doctors’ advice. The test results came out on Wednesday September 19, 2001.

“It’s not the end of the world.” The doctor had said as he handed me the test results. As I sat there short of words, staring at the results hoping to see a fine prints somewhere where that reads “this was all a joke” or something, but I never saw the fine prints I was looking for. “If you take good care of yourself and eat proper diet with good exercise, you could remain productive for about five (5) years or more.” He continued. “The most important thing is for you to think & live positively.” To me, that seemed like the verdict -5years!? I thought aloud, as the doctor shrugged and murmured something like: “unless you can afford the expensive treatments.”

I went home and cried like a baby even though I just turned 27 about two weeks earlier. Three days later, I’d told my fiancéé about my status and convinced her to get tested. Foluke and I have been  dating & we’ve been having unprotected-sex for about three year or so. She took the test precisely on Thursday September 27, 2001. And the result showed she was HIV negative! It was incredible, and I didn’t want to believe it. So I convinced her to take a second test a few months later, and she did –the results showed she was negative still! Foluke insists we should remain together whatever the case may be, and I couldn’t agree more. (Did I hear you say: “selfish?” Well, what can I say, isn’t love suppose to conquer all things?)

I continued living my live as if nothing had happened. Fuluke & I still make love regularly, and we were closer than ever! I know what you are thinking –did we use protections? Foluke wouldn’t hear/take any of that, no matter how hard I tried. What do you mean you don’t understand? Foluke vowed never to use a condom & somehow, she convinced me she could already have been infected anyway. Yes, I now know better; I should have insisted on protections.

I started taking expensive food-supplements like JUBI Formula and others in October 2001, just in case. I got Foluke on some contraceptives until we were sure it was okay to build a family. But that didn’t work, as Foluke got pregnant in June, 2004. I was beginning to look the shadow of myself, because the  food-supplements I was taking no longer function as such, rather it became more like a stimulant (yes! A stimulant, I had sex as frequent as Four to Five times a week). At that moment, Foluke was looking as radiant as ever, while people have started complaining about my sudden change in physical structure & look. Then it dawn on me what the doctor had said about “me living productively for Five years or thereabout”, it’s been almost three years since I tested positive and I already looked the way I did. I believed I won’t be around long enough to take care of Foluke & the baby, so I voluntarily resigned my appointment where I worked, and told my fiancéé that I had to leave town for a while to sort myself out (health wise). One of my cousins died of severe stigma as a result of her HIV status, and I was not prepared to face a fraction of what she went through. Her mother died also, as a result of what some people referred  to as shame and depression caused by the death of her daughter. Foluke broke down for days, and she eventually lost the baby in October 2004 (or so I heard) while I was away in a self-inflicted exile.

I had left Nigeria never to return, not minding where I was going, I walked out of my life, my friends & family, and everything I had ever known –I just left. I left on Tuesday June 22, 2004 on a plane that took me as far as possible from Nigeria after taking as much money as possible with me for the trip. And I’d made sure Foluke had enough to be comfortable for a while. Or till, if by some miracle I ever  returned.

I have since travelled far and wide on a death-row. I stayed in touch with Foluke, and no one-else for a few months. But when I couldn’t find myself returning anytime soon, I stopped writing (e-mail) to Foluke in other not to keep her hopes high or something. She sent me a mail that she now works in an organization where she is well paid (her current HIV status? I guess she’s still negative). As for me, I have since returned to Nigeria (but not Lagos where I used to live). And I got to know so much about HIV/AIDS based on several information/researches I have embarked upon. I am now taking the treatment thanks to the free treatment policy of the Federal government of Nigeria which millions of other PLWHA have also benefited from.

I intend to set-up an Information centre where information will be disseminated to people who got tested (positive) to the virus. These informations will be available in a Ten to Twenty paged booklets (something portable and easy to read), also in recorded tapes for those who may not be able to read (in Four different Nigerian languages), to help them deal with the scourge that may be associated with the virus. Hundreds of thousands of people are dying on a daily bases in Nigeria  and indeed Africa due to lack of information, or half-baked informations. If only people are well informed about the virus and how it can be controlled (even without ARVs); if only I had a fraction of the information I have on the virus now, I probably would have made a better decisions as concerned my life.

I have my whole life ahead of me now; I have dreams which must be accomplished, but first I have to make each day count and most importantly, I need to get a job soon! And no matter what the situation may be, LIFE MUST GO ON!

 

(back to top)

Nosi

My name is Nosi. I am from Port Elizabeth in the Eastern  Cape in South Africa. I found out that I was hiv positive in December 2001. I was pregnant and had to do the test so that I can take precaution measures for my baby. On the 15th  of December 2001, I was told I am positive. I knew that I could be because earlier on that same year, an ex-boyfriend of mine had come to tell me that he is hiv positive and has been for a while and would like me to go for a test as well. I kept on postponing it until I got pregnant and then I had no choice.

On February, 2, 2002 I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. He is now four years old and is the reason I am alive today. I went through depression and thought I was going to die, but I did not. I lived because I was carrying him, I talked to him while he was in my stomach, I apologized for bringing him to the world with such a risk at hand. Fortunately by God’s grace when I tested him in January this year, he tested negative. I thank God for him because I do not think I would have been able to live with myself if he had tested positive.

I told his father after a year, he was in shock and in denial for years but this year, he did the test finally and told his mother. He keeps on drinking and living a reckless life so, we broke up last year in September. Its been a year a nd a few months now since we broke up and although I miss him but I know that we have a dysfunctional relationship and he brings me down. My son loves him so much and I would love us to be a family but I don’t think its gonna happen.

The good news though is that in May this year, I met a man whom I told immediately that I am positive and he was okay with it, he is still around. He makes me so happy. He has brought so much joy in my life and I know that when I look back at my life I can smile because he loves me and has loved me and nothing else matters because he loves me. I would love to get married to him but sometimes feel that it will be unfair to him to do that because we cannot have kids, although he has a child and I have one. My dream is to marry him and become his wife. He is a gentle soul and loves me so.

Nosi

(back to top)

A South African family

The following was sent to us by a South African Bishop, describing one of the many families his diocese is trying to help.

The family has lost Grace, who was holding this dysfunctional family together. We helped with funeral expenses. We used R1,000 (US0) for the funeral parlour and an extra R2,000 (US0) on the funeral expenses and related things. It was very sad to see Grace die even if she was an alcoholic and changed boyfriends but in her own dysfunctionality maintained the family together and as such when she died the family now has broken apart.

The 15-year old child who had not been tested for HIV is now reported to be pregnant. We had moved her from the farm school to the township school, but she didn’t pass this June. Buhle, the young girl of 11, is HIV-positive, and we had moved her to be fostered by a lady from a local Christian organisation. Now the family has taken her, and they took her back to the farm. This continues to be a challenge.

We will withdraw support for the 15-year old, who is now pregnant. We pray that now the 13-year old boy will be helped to head this family. He was said to be HIV positive, but his recent results are saying negative, so we will monitor this.

AIDS kills. It is a situation where, with assistance, we can bring some glimmer of hope, and for that I am appreciative. It’s hitting closer to home. A couple of lay ministers, as I walk about, who are responsible leaders in their communities and parishes, are starting to show signs of ill-health, and the infection rate in the whole country doesn’t seem to stabilise… AIDS is not only in a particular population group or in the poor only, it is everywhere.

(back to top)

Manana

October 2003:

I'm a  43 year old mother of 4 daughters and a grandmother of one. I've never really put my emotions to anyone. I live in Botswana, Africa.

I tested +ve in March 2003, after about a year of persistent oral problems. I recall my GP asked me to test in August last year and I  did not. I was scared, DEAD SCARED

At the beginning of March I found this GP that I could relate to easily and I asked for a test. I remember as I was driving to his clinic on the 12th March, I kept thinking, THIS IS THE BEGINNING OF THE END. As expected the result was as I had thought. Much as I had suspected my status, I was in great shock. I drove back to my office, and realised it still hadn't sunk in. After about an hour I called my former husband, (with whom I have a wonderful friendship). He is an HIV counsellor.  I don't know what I would have done without him. He was not judgemental. I remember I kept asking him what I would say to my children, what they would think, what their friends would think, how they would react. Absurd as it may sound, he said I could tell who ever I wanted when I was ready.

That really helped me, I am in no pressure to tell anyone that I don't want to tell. So far I've told my partner and one friend who is also +ve. And, between them and my two doctors and former husband, I have all the support I need for now.

With my +ve friend, we started a Counselling and support group for affected and infected people in our community. We do not pressurise anyone to disclose their status, just to accept themselves and their loved ones and get as much information as they can on HIV/AIDS, and the interventions that are in place for the infected. I sincerely believe KNOWLEDGE IS THE KEY TO SURVIVAL.

We operate our support group through sheer determination and the Grace of God. So far we are 20 members. Personally I do this for the love of it, I guess it takes away the stress and depression that I would otherwise have. My partner says I'm doing this for myself, I  he may be right, I don't believe that being +ve is a death sentence

One day I will disclose my status to my family, I'm just not ready as yet. I am on meds, my cd4 was 223 in July, and the vl was undetectable, from 980 000.

I love life, I'm enjoying what I have right now. And I work for a great Organisation, totally supportive of the goverment's efforts towards HIV/AIDS.

Regards

Manana

January 2006:

I just wanted to let everyone know that after the last e mail that I sent I've responded really well to treatment.

As I said, when I started my viral load was 980 000 and cd was 223. I'm happy to say now my cd is 900 and viral load is  undetectable.

I had a choice whether to be on meds or not. Meds were the most logical since I had all sorts of oral problems. I developed thick legs and tummy due to the meds, but I took it upon my self to fight the disfigurement. I started walking 5 kilometres daily, which I've now reduced to 3 times a week, and I do press ups. The elephant calves have disappeared and the tummy is not recognisable.

By the way, I still haven't gone public, I don't see the reason why I should.

Lotsa love

MANANA

(back to top)

Lost

I'm a 24 year old woman living in JNB, South Africa. I lost my girl cousin to AIDS last year in Oct and was very angry for a while. My anger was directed towards her for keeping her own family in the dark until her ultimate death. After that I found out that my brother is also HIV positive and is taking his medicine regularly. This news shattered my world and I kept blaming God for all the wrongs in my life. Only now do I realize that it's only through our ignorance that we get this disease. I'm now living like a scared cat because last Friday I went to get myself tested and have been awaiting results. Today I get my results and I'm so scared.

My family is already devastated over my brother and I can't imagine them having to go through that again. I know that it's early for me to be speaking as if I'm positive or dying but my past lifestyle hasn't exactly been of a saint. That's all the reason to be scared. WISH ME LUCK AND PLS PRAY FOR ME FOR STRENGTH.

Lost

Johannesburg      

(back to top)

Angie

Hi 
my name is Angie and I am Zimbabwean.

I have had a pretty straight life with one boyfriend at a time.  In 2001 I found out I was pregnant and had a beautiful baby boy in November who was premature.  Things happened and I broke up with his father. I started dating this west-African guy who had it all going on for him but we always lived apart. I got tired of the abuse that I was going through with him (mentally and emotionally) and decided to just forget about him. I stopped contacting him and met a few guys but never got into relationship with them.  I always got tested and always came out negative.  Then I met the man I am with now in October 2004. He made me feel special and this time I decided that he was the one (within 2 weeks of knowing each other). I told him we had to be tested and went together.  I felt like the world had collapsed on me. I was HIV+ and he was negative.  He has been there by me but you can tell he is scared.  He is a wonderful man and has helped me maintain a healthy life.  I really believe my will to live is for him and my son.  He doesn't have any children but wants them.  He is just scared that the baby might be born +tive. I want to have his baby too and also fear the same thing.  I am still waiting for my cd4 count and pray it is normal.  If God asked me what wishes I would like him to grant me it will be to have one or two more kids and live a long life for them. And see them graduate.



Hopeful,

Angie

(back to top)

Mamello

I'm 20 years old and from South Africa. I remember when I was 14 and I wrote a poem called "silent killer", which was about AIDS. The disease wasn't a reality for me then...how things have changed.

I took my first test today. The results came back Negative, and although I'm happy and all, it really made me think. I find myself in a country where it's not a matter of default that someone my age is negative. So many of the people I grew up with are becoming sick and dying. In South Africa, funerals used to be held on Saturdays only. These days, its a Monday to Monday affair.

What really hits hard is the number of young people who seem to have the attitude that "it won't happen to me". Girls as young as 14 are falling pregnant - which obviously means that they are exposing themselves to monumental risk. And its even sadder is that so much time and money is being spent on education and prevention, and its hard to see the positive effects.

AFRICA IS DYING SLOWLY...

To all those who are +ve... please stay strong. Joshua 1:9 says "be strong and of good courage, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Even if all else fails, He will never, ever stop loving you.

To everyone who is -ve, please stay that way.

Mamello

If Africa is to be re-awakened, then HOPE needs to be restored. Here's to A RE-AWAKENING OF HOPE"

(back to top)

TK

I'm 26, living in South Africa. I just found out that I'm hiv +ve exactly two weeks ago. What can I say? It's been a whirlwind of emotions, from feeling on top of the world when finding out that I was pregnant, to literally wanting to curl up and die the next day when the doc told me my test results came back +ve. I‚m married to someone I consider the love of my life. When we met, I took an hiv test, it was negative. He told me he'd recently taken one as a requirement to be accepted for an overseas study programme, and he'd tested negative. Since then, he said, he'd practised safe sex. I believed him, and asked no further questions. I found out afterwards that what he actually meant by safe sex was that he'd since been involved with just one woman since testing negative, but he wasn't using protection. A few months after we started having unprotected sex, I fell gravely ill. The doc suggested I take another test, I refused, saying I wasn't ready for the stress and besides, I was sure I was negative. I recovered slowly but from then it was one thing or the other with my health, skin rashes, new allergies, my skin has literally changed in the space of one year and for the first time I'm using concealing make-up and choosing my summer tops very carefully. I guess the warning signs have been there since I fell sick earlier this year, I'm educated on hiv and some of my symptoms literally had the warning bells ringing inside my head. Still, the shock of discovering my status is something I will never wish on my worst enemy. I thought my life is over. Ok I know what they say about hiv no longer being a death sentence but in my mind my life as I knew it, is over. In fact, I started thinking of ways I could end my life. My husband has been by my side all along, and he is just as devastated. I hold no grudge against him at all, I‚ve forgiven him. I honestly believe he was just ignorant about it all, just as I was - not making him take the test instead believing what he said. Before my husband, I had one four-year and one three-year relationship. I still believe he's the one I should be with. When I read what Rita said about being angry all the time, at God and at her husband, I was compelled to write my story. I just want to say to her ŒRita, please try to forgive your husband. I know it‚s not easy, I‚m battling just as hard to forgive myself. Like you, I consider myself well-educated and ambitious, we're both the same age in SA so I sort of know what kind of future we feel we deserve. The transformation in your husband is in itself a blessing that has come out of this situation, and through his renewed faith, you will also be blessed and in time, you will regain your trust in the Lord. Just the fact that you now have a beautiful healthy baby is in itself another blessing. As for our baby, we decided to keep it but after further tests revealed that my cd4 count was very low, my doc advised that it wouldn‚t be the best option to keep it as the chances of infecting it would be high. So I terminated it the very same week. I was devastated, I still am. I cry almost everyday and it‚s taking a toll on my health. But like you, I want to live, I want children in my marriage and I want to see them grow up. And sometimes I actually do believe I will achieve all of that and more. I also came very close to denouncing God and even questioned his existence in the past two weeks, but my husband, like yours, has been very strong in prayer and through him I'm beginning to come to terms with this and my faith in God is being restored. We have not told a soul, and do not plan to do so anytime soon, at least until we get a grip ourselves. We start meds soon and I hope that will be the beginning of a new and positive life for us. Stay strong and keep expressing your feelings.

Much love

TK

(back to top)

Rita

I have read stories from other HIV positive people and I think I should share mine with you too.

I am a married woman aged 39 years with four children. I am a South African living in South Africa.

I discovered that I am HIV positive in November 2000 when I wanted to insure my house. In April that year, my husband was hospitalised and discharged without my knowledge as he was working away from home. I came to know when I phoned him. When he was discharged he came home for two to three weeks. For the rest of his stay at home we did not have sex which was strange and he looked worried.

Towards the end of June the same year my 1 year daughter who I was breastfeeding was admitted in hospital and it was pneumonia which I did not think much about its connection with her father's illness.

In October when we had to undergo the HIV test I was confident but my husband was nervous although he pretended to be fine.
One day when I got home I was got a message from the Doctor that we should both of us I myself and my husband) see him. It was Friday afternoon. What came right to my mind was that I was going to get the bad news. I only started to think back, my husband got sick and my daughter ……eish.

As usual my husband ignored the importance of meeting the Doctor and went back to his workplace. On Monday I called the Doctor and confirmed an appointment. I had to go there alone and I was told that I was HIV positive. I can't explain the situation I went through, you know I nearly collapsed, I went straight home to sleep. I only told my children that I was not feeling well. I did not have courage to tell them my status because I am only their last hope in life.

I took three days crying, without eating, until I felt that I was weak and could not do anything. That was when I remembered that I had someone special to talk to which was GOD. I prayed, I read the Bible from time to time crying accusing God of what has happened to me. You know from the readings I got courage, I told myself that at least for the remaining years I could work hard for my children.

On my own I think I am tough, I can handle the situation but what eats me every day of my life is looking at my little girl who is also suffering. She will be four in July this year. I always blame myself for breast feeding. I thought I loved her, look at what has happened, she is also HIV positive. I wish I could confess to her but she is too young to understand.

The reason I regret breastfeeding my daughter is that in February the same year I had to be operated and I tested negative. The other thing I suspect is that my husband did this purposely, maybe he was told when he was in hospital, that is why when he got home we did not have any sex. But when next he came home we continued with unprotected sex.

The people who know about my status are my two sisters who are supportive indeed.

I wish all the best for everyone.

Regards

Rita

(back to top)

Ciku

Dear Sisters,

I read your letters with fear and trembling and yet at the same time I draw some hope from you.

I am a Kenyan woman, I have been affected through seeing my relatives pass away from the HIV pandemic.

I believe and trust with you all, that you will live longer lives, to see your daughters grow and to enjoy your grandchildren. God is the provider of life, may He sustain and prosper your lives. I love you all.

Ciku

(back to top)

Thabisa

I'm writing to you on a day I feel so down and feel that life can be unfair. Once again the virus has taken a friend, and a dear person to me. A person I got to share joy, laughter, and many other things with.

She died in her sleep. I am hurting, you have no idea. I do not want to tell lies. I nursed this woman back to life last week. She was so cold and kept telling me to put on extra blankets. The room was so hot I was sweating from trying to make her warm. Even massaging her feet would not help. I had to go inside her blanket and sleep with her to try and bring her to at least the body temperature while waiting for an ambulance. I cannot believe that she did not make it!

She was so beautiful and more over she had a beautiful heart! I saw her before leaving for Grahamstown and she looked promising. One could swear that she was almost faking it, the way she kept her smile on even though she was loosing the battle. I do realise that I cannot be jack of all trades, and that there was absolutely nothing I could do, as I could not take her pain away. I just wish I was next to her bed when she gave up the fight.

Other than that we had a lovely Christmas party at the centre (the Raphael Centre) on Friday. The children loved the presents and they sang so well!

Fond regards,Thabisa

"Live and let live"

Unity against HIV/Aids

(back to top)

Tokello

Hi

I wrote in last saying that I was sick and worried, I was diagnosed with pneumonia and I lost all hope of seeing the year through (2001). Its over a year now and I have never been sick after that, I always take everything to the Lord in prayer, for if it was not for his grace I would not be alive today. Each day I thank him for making me not loose hope and faith in him and I know that there is a purpose that he has put me in this world.

I don't have much to say but I almost took antiviral drugs.

I recently went to have a test and my CD4 cell count is up from 624. It went up to 946 (17/10/2002) which made say that the lord looks after us.

What I am trying to say with all this, is to all those that are HIV+ never lose faith. What I have learned also is that eating a healthy diet and also keeping fit helps no matter what other people say.

Keep well.

Tokello,from South Africa.

Editorial: Having strong religious beliefs and eating a good diet has clearly worked for Tokello in keeping her CD4 count high. For other people, eating the same foods as they always did and not taking vitamin supplements can still keep them healthy and their CD 4 counts relatively high. Many people, when they become HIV+, make decisions about lifestyles, diet and religious beliefs. One way of life will not work for everyone, you have to find the way that works for you.

(back to top)

Percy

This page normally has on it contributions from people living in Africa. But we have made an exception for Percy Mashaire's story below.

Dear Friends,

Last year I lost my 28-year-old sister to AIDS. She was beautiful and bright, and had a responsible job with the Harare City Council in Zimbabwe. Her death was devastating for us the immediate family as well the community she worked and lived in. Her two daughters aged 10 and 8 are now orphans.

We had hardly recovered from her death when my other sister was diagnosed HIV positive. Her condition had deteriorated quite sharply with the CD4 count down to 42. She succumbed to illness, and could not eat anything, never mind keep anything in her stomach.

We were all desperate because there was no way that she could get any medication. Then some friends in Finland (where I currently live) supplied us with anti-retrovirals left over when they changed to other drugs. Medical regulations here stipulate that these excess drugs should be returned to the treatment centres from whence they are destroyed. Luckily these friends had not done so and they gave us the drugs, which we sent to my sister. With the help of her doctor she began taking them. The recovery has been amazing. She has gained weight, can now walk, eat and care for her 7-year-old daughter whose father died from cancer some years back.

Despite the happy news, my sister is, however, far from danger because the anti-retrovirals are running out. I have been in contact with her doctor and he says that any kind of anti-retrovirals would be good for her because her biological system is very receptive. But I am now stranded because my friends no longer have any left over drugs. My partner and I have done everything we can. We have approached local pressure and treatment groups, hospitals, pharmacies and even appealed to the Finnish president. All to no avail.

The painful tragedy is that here we are in a country where AIDS is no longer a dreaded killer due to the availability of drugs and treatment, and yet on the other side of the world we have a young mother overshadowed by death and life as an orphan for her daughter. Life-saving medicines are being burnt right in front of our eyes!

Please help if you can. We know that throwing pills at a single individual is not the best way to tackle the AIDS epidemic in Africa, but we need help NOW to save this young mother and somehow ensure a normal life for her 7-year-old daughter.

Sincerely yours, Percy Mashaire

(back to top)